Everybody can set up a Facebook account and learn how to use it, but not everyone will know proper Facebook etiquette. We believe that alongside the terms and conditions, Facebook should have a list of things that you shouldn’t do on Facebook; something to guide you and make your life online easy; something that will help you thrive online. Whether you want to pick up women on Facebook or simply see what others are up to, you need to know some basic Facebook rules so that you don’t embarrass yourself or others while online. We have the 10 commandments of Facebook that you should respect.
10. Thou Shall Not Post of Chat While Intoxicated
After a couple of drinks everybody gets chatty and horny. If you’re on Facebook, this means that you’re all alone at that moment, so there’s no way you can satisfy any of those two basic human desires, for conversation and copulation, so you will try to spark up a conversation. Don’t! That’s all we can tell you. It’s a bad idea to chat while intoxicated for all the reasons mentioned in every book and movie ever!
9. Thou Shall Not Bug People with Games
We’ve all been there, obsessed with a Facebook game until friends organized a small intervention where there was coffee and cake. Alright, maybe that was just me and my experience, but following that, I’m pretty sure that your friends don’t want to be bugged by you and your silly games. It’s true that you can block an app on Facebook, but you should just not gift or add anyone that you don’t know is playing the same game you are.
8. Thou Shall Not Post Pictures of Food, Bathrooms or Beds
The FBBs pictures are the worst. People don’t want to know what you’re having for lunch every day and they certainly don’t want to see your ugly mug reflected in your bathroom mirror while you’re taking a selfie of yourself… or while you’re in your pajamas getting ready to sleep. You may think that’s cute, but it’s not.
7. Thou Shall Not Rant
There’s nothing worse than ranting on your Facebook wall. Ranting on for hours or days on a particular subject is the perfect way of getting people to unfriend you. We understand that you’re very passionate about something, but do try to tone it down, for the sake of your friends.
6. Thou Shall Proofread
Proofread your comments and updates before you post them. Don’t just comment and post willy-nilly! And you happen to post something that has a spelling error or if you just want to change something, remember that there is an EDIT option, you don’t have to comment again to rectify.
5. Thou Shall Not Post Offensive Images
One of the most important commandments of Facebook is that you do not post offensive or disturbing images on your wall. Let’s say you’re a filthy racist, then you should keep all that to yourself. Let’s say you love animals and you’re compelled to share a picture of a dead dog to save thousands of dogs (you see the connection), don’t do it!
4. Thou Shall Not Post Idiotic Profile Pictures
Why would you want to post a silly picture of yourself for the world to see? Why not choose one in which you look like a decent human being? Or better yet, why not pick something where you actually look like yourself? So many people post pictures of themselves where they don’t even look like they do in real life. Who are they trying to fool?
3. Thou Shall Not Poke
Facebook should take out poking. What in sweet God’s name is poking?! What is its purpose? If you want to approach the person you can just say hi in a message, post something on their wall or write a comment on one of their pictures. Poking is like you’re telling them you’re thinking about them, but not enough to start a conversation.
2. Thou Shall Not Friend People You Don’t Know
The people who befriend people who they don’t know fall into two categories: the ones who are so desperate for human contact that they’ll add or accept pretty much anyone with two arms and two legs and the ones who don’t understand Facebook. Try to add people you’ve met at least once, so that you don’t become the creepy dude/dudette who is all over the place.
1. Thou Shall Not Post Crappy Status Updates
If you’re going to be vague, better not update your status. If you’re going to be lame and post some inspirational crap, better not update your status. If you’re going to be 12 and post the lyrics of some corny song, better not update your status. You get the idea! We’re not saying that every update of yours is supposed to be pure poetry, but try to at least keep it decent.
What are your thoughts on these 10 commandments of Facebook? Do you agree or disagree? Would you like to add something? If you do, drop us a line in the comment section below, we’d love to hear from you!
