From fake tattoo sleeves to carrying around a motorcycle helmet without actually having a motorcycle, there are many ways of faking badassery. Here are 10 ways of looking like a badass without actually being one.
10. There’s an Art to Brooding
James Dean could brood like no other man ever could. Learn from him how to squint like a badass and avoid looking like an old man trying to read his prescription. Look mysterious even though you are an open book, have that certain je ne sais quoi without having it. Fake it till you make it!
9. Break Rules
We’re not implying you should go out and steal from an old lady, but as a badass you shouldn’t have to obey all those little rules that were made for common people. Jaywalk, smoke where it is forbidden, but don’t litter… never ever litter, you’re supposed to be a badass, not a douche.
8. Perfect Hair
The secret with hair looking badass is to have it look as if no effort has been put into styling it. Bed hair or I just drove with all the windows down hair looks damn sexy and badass. Style it well and always check it twice before leaving the house. When out in public try not to stare in any windows or mirrors, you wouldn’t want people to think you’re obsessed with your hair!
7. Have a Manly Drink
Let’s say you’re not a drinker – that’s OK, you can order a manly drink, such as a whisky or a beer and sip from it all night long. Careful with the beer, warm beer is the farthest thing from badassery. Just remember not to order any cocktails – juice and booze is not badass. This goes for girls too, if you’re trying to get a badass vibe going, have a shot of tequila!
6. Fake Tattoo Sleeves
What’s more badass than having tattoos? Nothing! If you’re too squeamish about getting them, try some fake tattoo sleeves. They look cool enough to trick people into believe you’re badass… from a distance.
5. Motorcycles are Always Badass
If you have a motorcycle then you’re not only a badass, but you might also be a bad guy – which are not necessarily the same thing. A badass is a bad guy but a bad guy may not be a badass. Deep stuff, we know! If you don’t have a motorcycle, get a helmet and carry it around with you. Just make sure you don’t overdo it, you’ll just look stupid.
4. Badasses don’t Smile
Instead of smiling, try perfecting your smirk. Gently lift the right corner of your upper lip – practice it in the mirror, it takes some time to pin down. Elvis was a smirker and he was a hit with the ladies. It will work for you if you manage to do it right. If not, you’ll look like you’re trying to get a piece of tomato peel off of your teeth. Yuck!
3. Be Chill
Be chill about the things that are going on around you. Don’t get over excited about anything, actually don’t get excited at all. If people ask you what you think about something, pause, think, weigh your words well before answering and then respond in a very calm manner – they’ll think you’re wise and cool.
2. Talk Slowly
When you’re talking try a mellow tone of voice. We’re not saying you should go full Brando on us, but something close. Talking fast will let on people to believe that you’re hyperactive and want to show off, and that’s the last thing a badass will want to do.
1. Relax, Don’t Do It…
… when you want to go do it. Take your time whatever it is that you’re doing. A too cool to care attitude will always appear badass, even though inside you’re dying to rush things. Learn to relax and let this show on your posture. Don’t fidget with your phone or beer bottle, keep your hands and feet still when you’re sitting down.
We hope you we gave you some good pointer on how to be a badass. Try some out, not all of them, because it will seem like you’re trying too hard and trying too hard is never badass. Go on, put on those fake tattoo sleeves and your smirk and go out into the world. Just don’t blame us if you get your bad ass kicked.