movie date

While Hollywood kind of taught women that the most desirable men are the strong silent types with a badass attitude and alpha – male behaviors, there are still a lot of shy guys out there who make great couple partners if you know how to conquer them step by step. Being shy doesn’t mean they lack a personality or a superhero attitude, it just means they take their time before completely opening up to you and initiate the seduction tango all women love so much. So if you met a shy guy and feel he is right for you despite his timid allure, we have 10 tips to conquer a shy guy that we hope will help you build a strong and beautiful relationship.

1. Befriend him first, but beware the friend-zone

friend zone

Some say that most shy guys are only shy in the presence of women or the girl they like, but don’t confide enough in themselves to make some moves. If you want to make him feel comfortable around you and give him the opportunity to open up, spend some time together as buddies, but avoid the friend-zone. If you want a partner and not another best friend, make sure you’re letting him understand in a subtle way that you like him without scaring him.

2. Let him talk about what he likes

man woman talking

All people get really passionate and open when it comes to their favorite conversation topics, so you could have a friendly dinner together and stir the conversation towards his passions, hobbies and interests. It will help him relax and share things with you.

3. Ask him out together with common friends

friends having wine party

A shy guy will probably feel uncomfortable with a girl being too straightforward and asking him out on a date, but making the date sound like a friendly gathering with nothing to worry about may convince him. While at the party, flirt with him but don’t play the vamp card, it will make him run away screaming. Just show him that a great woman is interested in him.

4. Get him interested in who you are

man woman talking

While it is recommended to listen to him, ask him questions and encourage honesty and mutual trust, don’t turn into his favorite confessor. You want to conquer him, so step into the conversation and tell him interesting things about yourself, things you are certain will appeal to him.

5. Smile to him a lot

woman smiling

Among the tips to conquer the shy guy, this one should be a no – brainer, as all women smile naturally to the men they like. Well, some of the ladies have the seduction skill very well upgraded and they play all sorts of hide – and – seek smiling and peeking games, but in the case of the shy guy, smile to him mildly and wholeheartedly without playing games with him, he may not understand what is going on or feel comfortable with that.

6. Keep the conversation going through social media

social media

Face – to – face communication and interaction is sometimes a drag even for normally sociable and confident people, let alone shy individuals. But social media helps people talk and share things without the pressure of being judged and labeled for the way they look, sit, gesture or are wearing, so keep your shy guy close through social media. Without turning into an obsessed female stalker, of course.

7. Be sexy and seducing without showing too much

woman dress

Shy or not, he is still a man, so the oldest tricks in the book also work in his case too. Look ravishing every time you meet, wear the perfume that makes you feel sexy and confident, make sure he notices your new haircut, your new dress or your new lipstick shade, but don’t show too much skin or display too many conquering schemes, he might think you are a bit too much for him.

8. Pay him compliments but don’t exaggerate


He is shy for some reasons, right? Maybe he isn’t sure he’s good looking enough, or well dressed enough, or smart enough or financially potent enough or he is just not used to women wandering around him making conversation. So from time to time pay him honest compliments about the way he looks, he smells or he approaches a conversation topic, he will have his self esteem boosted enough to try further to impress you.

9. Be discrete

keeping secrets

Shy guys may have some issues with trusting in their fellow human beings and sometimes are reluctant in opening up to people, so whatever he tells you, especially if there are sensible information and intimate details, keep them to yourself. It will build his trust in you and if you really like him, show him you can be a reliable partner even if you have some of his secrets on your hands.

10. Make dates be comfortable to him and build pressure progressively

movie date

Going to the movies or to the theater in the beginning might cut him some slack for a while, as conversation is quite forbidden in such places. If you went out together enough times to open him up to you and feel comfortable around you, then it’s time to slowly get rid of the accompanying friends and switch the cinema (or the fast food joint) to a more intimate location, such as a restaurant for a dinner – in – two session or a relaxed picnic in the park. Arrange your dates carefully and each time make another step, he will appreciate the time you are giving him and the patience you show.

We hope these 10 tips to conquer a shy guy helped you ladies to make up your minds and give the gentleman a chance, as who knows, he may actually be the man of your life. If you have other advice and tips for the ones who are dating (or just liking very much) shy guys, let them know in the comments!